After 5,468 days, England finally win a Test Down Under

There are Christmas dinner leftovers that will outlast this joke of a Boxing Day Test but after nearly 15 winless years and 19 matches in Australia, any victory is worth savouring.

Just ask Joe Root and Ben Stokes. They had a long, protracted hug by the boundary when the winning runs came via four leg byes. The emotion poured out not just because of the stresses of this tour, made worse by accusations of “stag do” behaviour in Noosa, but also relief at finally knowing what it feels like to win in Australia.

Those two old stagers had never managed it before and Jacob Bethell was a seven-year-old Bridgetown schoolboy when England last did it at the SCG on January 7, 2011 – a total of 5,468 days ago.

Now here was Bethell, recalled at the expense of Ollie Pope and living up to England’s belief he is a player for the big occasion, skipping down the pitch to top score with 40 in front of 92,045 spectators as the pantomime rhythms of this match set the scene for the Bazball taps to be turned on again.

Set 175 – the highest total of the game – after bowling Australia out for 132 in 34 overs, the situation suited an England side who could go for their shots and live in the moment.

Should winning a two-day crapshoot by four wickets make any difference to the futures of those in charge? Not necessarily because the failures in preparation, selection and professionalism when the series was live must be properly reviewed.

But if they can build on this in Sydney next week, then it does put a different complexion on a failed venture. For individual players, there is a lot to play for at the SCG, and they can sleep easier in the knowledge they have avoided the ignominy of a whitewash.

Stokes was empty and world-weary before the match when he had to defend his players from the Noosa fallout, pleading for empathy for individuals caught up in a storm.

A flat pitch, blazing sunshine and gruelling sessions in the field would have been far too much for a broken England side to cope with but a seaming, low-scoring thriller brought them into the game. It was the break they needed.

This is the first Ashes series since 1888 to feature a pair of two-day Tests as grassy pitches and modern players unable to defend combined to cost Cricket Australia millions of dollars in refunds. The Perth two-dayer lost them £2.5m, here the deficit will be double with a 90,000 sell-out on day three. If you can’t beat ‘em, bankrupt ‘em.

The MCG is a spectacular sight when full, and even better for England fans when it starts to empty because their team is on the verge of winning. There were plenty of vacant seats up in the gods as the winning runs were struck at 5.25pm with many Australia fans already standing on the platform at nearby Jolimont station, the voices of the celebrating Barmy Army carrying to them on the chill wind.

England fans celebrate — England fans finally had something to celebrate – Getty Images/Daniel Pockett

England’s bowlers won the Test by outperforming Australia and setting a gettable total that cleared the frazzled minds of batsmen drained of confidence. They know how to play a run chase. The intent from Zak Crawley and Ben Duckett was obvious straight away. Duckett was off the mark first ball, clipping four off his legs and Crawley pinged Michael Neser for a straight six.

Duckett swung like a drunk looking for a taxi home, connecting with a ramp over the keeper’s head for six and while his 34 from 26 balls was ugly, he showed his tenacity and character to forget his form and Noosa embarrassment, taking 51 out of the target with Crawley before he was cleaned up by Starc.

A Bazball move to promote Carse to No 3 as a pinch hitter failed but England raced to 100 for two from 15.2 overs, their second fastest hundred against Australia. Steve Smith acknowledged the heavy assault softened the ball enough to neuter his seamers.

Bethell bounded to the crease, hit his third ball from Scott Boland for four and drilled another through the covers as hope began to drain for Australia. He tried to ramp the first ball after tea and missed but the 47 stand with Crawley was pivotal.

Boland threatened more MCG heroics when he dismissed both Bethell and Crawley but Australia ran out of road. They just did not have enough runs to defend as the pitch started to flatten out.

Australia’s grumbles about the surface are well-founded but they were not that disappointed to see it rolled out the day before the game. They lost Nathan Lyon a week ago, so were happy with a grassy, seaming surface that would play to their bowling strengths. However, the groundsman undercooked it and in turn their technical deficiencies were exposed by England’s attack, who bowled fuller and consistently straighter than Australia, who badly missed Pat Cummins and Josh Hazlewood.

Carse had his best day of the series, finally justifying Stokes’s faith, with four for 34. His dismissal of Travis Head, bowled by a ball that pitched on leg and hit the top of off, sparked a collapse of seven for 50 as Australia lurched from 82 for three to 132 all out.

Josh Tongue probed away again for two for 44, constantly asking questions with his unusual action, and England’s discipline with the ball enabled them to overcome the loss of Gus Atkinson with a hamstring injury early on in the day.

It adds to the frustration of the 3-1 scoreline that Australia’s batting has been carried by Head and Alex Carey as well as intermittent contributions from Smith. The rest are either not good enough, out of nick, or past it, and were there for the taking but it was not until the fourth Test that England’s seamers located the right length on an Australian pitch, and that goes down to planning.

Head top scored with 46 but lived on his wits as the ball zipped around. Jake Weatherald played on, changing his mind, such was his uncertainty. Tongue’s release point above the perpendicular and whirl-of-arms action bemused Australia again. Marnus Labuschagne could not cope. He stormed off, throwing his chewing gum when the third umpire adjudged an edge to slip off Tongue had carried.

With Australia three down and the lead over 100, Carse came back for a crucial spell just before lunch. England could not afford more wastefulness but finally it clicked. A beauty bowled Head. Tongue had Usman Khawaja caught off a top edge, beaten for pace in the next over and Australia lost their third in 12 balls when Carey steered Carse to slip.

Cam Green played the worst shot of the innings, giving the cordon catching practice, in the sixth over after lunch and Carse mopped up Starc and Neser, two tail-enders capable of resistance.

Smith was unable to farm the strike and was left stranded with the innings over an hour before tea. Those with tickets for day three were already making other plans.

Atkinson set to miss final Test while Stokes faces fitness test

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Gus Atkinson looks certain to miss the final Ashes Test in Sydney, with Ben Stokes to be monitored in the coming days after appearing in discomfort while bowling.

Atkinson will have a scan on Sunday to determine the seriousness of a hamstring injury he suffered in the win at the MCG, but he appears extremely unlikely to be fit for the fifth Test, which starts on January 4.

He pulled up bowling the last ball of his fourth over on the second morning, and was not seen again in the match, which England won by four wickets. Josh Tongue and Brydon Carse stepped up to share six wickets, then Jacob Bethell’s 40 provided the backbone of their chase of 175.

England have already lost Mark Wood after just one Test and Jofra Archer after three in this series, so their bowling stocks are being severely stretched. Those injuries came after Chris Woakes’s injury-enforced Test retirement and Jamie Overton’s withdrawal from red-ball contention before the tour.

Matthew Potts and Matthew Fisher will vie to replace Atkinson in Sydney, and they could call up further fast-bowling support.

Stokes, meanwhile, appeared to suffer discomfort in the groin region while following through in his bowling action on the second day, but soldiered through until the end of the innings and then batted as the game approached its conclusion. His fitness will be assessed before the Sydney Test, but three extra days off will help his cause of playing a full-role as an all-rounder.

Stokes has had a tricky time with injuries in recent years, with serious left knee surgery, two torn hamstrings and a shoulder issue causing him to sit out Tests, or play as a specialist batsman on occasion. In England’s defeat in Adelaide, he suffered from exhaustion that prevented him from bowling, having batted for more than 200 balls in 40 degree heat.

Stokes said the team were “proud and buzzing” after earning England’s first win in Australia for 15 years, having received criticism for on and off-field reasons following a trip to Noosa.

“It’s been not only a tough tour for us as a team out here, but obviously, everything that’s gone before us,” he said of England winning their first Test in Australia since 2011.

“So to be stood here now, and you know, be part of a team who’s managed to win a game out in Australia after a long period of time, it is a pretty good feeling.

“I think it’ll mean a hell of a lot to everyone. You have people at different stages of their careers in international cricket where, some are on their first tours of Australia and then me and Joe who have been here and a few times and been on the wrong end of the result a few times. We all share that same satisfaction of winning a game out here.

“Adding to that, it’s a Boxing Day Test, a very big sporting event. There are all different types of emotions associated with this victory. We are very proud and buzzing that we have managed to get this.

“This win does mean a lot. I’ve been over here a few times and not managed to get a win and there’s also that stuff before this game. But we’re not going to let the feeling of this victory flow on further than it needs to. We’ve got a few days to rest and recover before Sydney but we’ll go into Sydney in the exact same mindset we had before this game to win another game of cricket.”

07:27am

Scyld Berry’s player ratings

Jacob Bethell
1 and 40

Barely having played any red-ball cricket in this calendar year had one advantage: he was not so lacking in confidence as many other batsmen, on both sides, going into this game. Faintest of edges on to his pad in his first innings; in his second, 40 off only 46 balls, he was princely in his strokeplay. England have found their number three in Bethell, which they did a year ago, but the selectors might realise it this time. 8

Ben Stokes on the MCG pitch

We got the win – but honestly, it’s not what you want really. It’s not ideal, the game lasting less than two days. But when you take all that away, you are confronted with conditions and you have to do what’s the best mode of operation to give you the best chance of success. I’m really proud of the way we want about the run-chase.

07:01am

Ten reasons this was the most ludicrous Test match in history

Kevin Pietersen led the criticism of the Melbourne Cricket Ground wicket, describing it as “disrespectful to the greatest form of the game”.

The fourth Test of the Ashes series looks almost certain to finish in two days after 10mm of grass was left on the wicket.

That gave the bowlers a huge amount of assistance and after 20 wickets fell on day one it looks likely that the Test will come to a close with England chasing 175 to win.

Here, Telegraph Sport looks at the reasons the Boxing Day clash was the most ludicrous Test match in history.

Ben Stokes: I’m a very, very proud captain

It’s been a tough tour up until now and we’re over the moon that we could get on the right side of the result. To be part of a team that managed to win a game in Australia [after 15 years] is a really good feeling.

[On the Barmy Army] We play for so many different things, and the support we get from the Barmy Army and all our supporters is very, very special. There’s constant noise going on – the guys out in the middle… they hear it, they feel it and we know this means a helluva lot to them. There might be some sore heads among them tomorrow.

There was a lot thrown our way in the build-up to this Test. We tried to stay focussed on the task of beating a very good Australian side. A lot of credit has to go to the players, the staff and all the management to make the sure the lads’ focus was completely and utterly on the cricket. Yeah, I’m a very, very proud captain.

The way we batted today was the right approach on a pitch that was so heavily in favour of the bowlers. You can’t just let good bowlers run up and constantly land it on the area that’s dangerous. I thought the way we combated that was brilliant.

Josh Tongue, what an occasion for him. He was outstanding at Adelaide as well, so to back it up in front of such a huge crowd was absolutely awesome. [Jacob Bethell] played a very, very crucial knock in tricky conditions; he showed the class that we see in him.

Ben Stokes became the first England captain since Sir Andrew Strauss to win a Test match in Australia. – Asanka Brendon Ratnayake/Reuters

06:49am

Steve Smith’s reaction

It’s a tricky one. Obviously a very quick game! If we got 50-60 more runs across both innings, we might have been there at the end, but credit to England – they bowled really well this morning, didn’t let us get away, and then they were very aggressive with the bat. That probably softened the ball a bit. Credit to them for the way they played.

The pitch didn’t really change. It did a fair amount the whole game. It’s just probably where the ball got softened by a few lusty blows from their top order today; that’s when it started to do a bit less potentially.

[On the pitch] I think [tt was] a little bit too much [in favour of the bowlers]. It was tricky, no one could really get in. When you see 36 wickets across two days, that’s probably too much. Maybe if we drop it down to 8mm [of grass] that might be all right potentially.

06:45am

The player of the match is Josh Tongue (5/45 & 2/44)

It’s what dreams are made of – to get a five-for on Boxing Day and get on the honours board is a really special feeling.

I was in a tough situation with my body [in 2021-22] and I thought about retiring. I’m glad I put in the hard work to get back playing cricket and then to play for England. It’s all I’ve wanted to do.

06:42am

A long time coming

The Barmy Army celebrate England's first Test win in Australia since 2011. — The Barmy Army celebrate England’s first Test win in Australia since 2011. – Daniel Pockett/Getty Images

06:37am

Jacob Bethell’s reaction

It was lovely to come in and make an impact, and more importantly to make an impact in a win. It was a great experience.

In the first innings I probably didn’t have enough conviction to go out there straight away and try to put them off their length. The second innings, especially when you’re chasing one of those niggly totals, it was pretty clear we had to go out and try to get them off it as quickly as possible.

[Have you experienced an atmosphere like this before?] No. Definitely not. It’s been pretty special, I’ve got my parents in the crowd as well – they timed that well, coming over for this game!

06:31am

Joe Root’s reaction

To lose the series is very disappointing but it was really important we showed a lot of character for the rest of the series. There’s been a lot thrown at the team and the way we’ve responded in these two days has been excellent. We adapted to the surface as much we could and we exploited it when we had the opportunity. We showed a lot of bravery with the way we approached things with the bat.

I was disappointed to get out but to win the game is the most important thing. I’m really pleased and proud of all these lads.

We’re so lucky with the support we get. Look at the amount of people who are here, who’ve travelled from the other side of the world. They do it everywhere, we’re so lucky to have them and I’m really pleased they can enjoy this victory.

[On Jacob Bethell] Outstanding. The conviction that he played with, the smarts that he had – using the crease, making it difficult for the bowlers to hold length… that takes bravery and a lot of skill. It’s why he’s gonna have such a bright future in international cricket.

06:28am

A landmark win for Root and Stokes

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A truly crazy game, over in just two days. That does not matter a jot for England, and especially Joe Root and Ben Stokes, who have finally won a game on these shores. Root is on his fourth tour, Stokes his third.

The team are heading over en masse to Bay 13 to thank the Barmy Army, who are cheering in their thousands.

Steve Smith congratulates Ben Stokes at the end of the game. – Quinn Rooney/Getty Images

06:25am

England win by four wickets!

OVER 33: ENG 174/6 (Brook 18 Smith 3) England seal victory with four leg-byes when Richardson strays onto the pads of Brook. They have finally won a Test in Australia for the first time since January 2011. There are no wild celebrations from Ben Stokes but it’s clear how much this means to him and his players after a desperately disappointing tour.

It was a crazy match, the second two-day Test of the series after more than a century without one in the Ashes, and almost a mirror image of that traumatic defeat at Perth a month ago.

06:23am

OVER 32: ENG 174/6 (Brook 18 Smith 3)

Scores level. Jamie Smith calmly times his first ball through midwicket for three. Brook chips the next delivery languidly for four and takes a single on the off side. A no-ball from Starc means a seventh delivery, one to win – but he hammers in a bouncer to ensure England don’t win the match on his watch.

06:18am

Wicket!

Stokes c Carey b Starc 2 England still need 10 to win! Stokes has an almighty yahoo at Starc, the kind of shot he played in the summer of 2022, and is superbly caught by the leaping Alex Carey. Surely not. FOW: 165/6

06:15am

OVER 31: ENG 165/5 (Brook 13 Stokes 2)

Brook charges Richardson and smears the ball towards mid-on, where Boland makes a scrambling stop. A superb pull for four is followed by a lusty swipe at fresh air; a speculative Australian review for caught behind is unsuccessful.

06:11am

OVER 30: ENG 161/5 (Brook 9 Stokes 2)

Mitchell Starc returns, presumably with Ben Stokes in mind. If England lose this, all future tours to Australia should be cancelled; there will be no point.

Starc sprays a delivery down the leg side and Carey flies to his right to save four byes. Stokes digs out a sandshoe crusher before clipping two runs through square leg. Fourteen to win.

Ben Stokes in action with the bat. – JAMES ROSS/Shutterstock

06:01am

OVER 29: ENG 158/5 (Brook 8 Stokes 0)

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The final crowd figure here is 186,244 across two days, which is amazing. The ones we can hear now are the Barmy Army, who have travelled a long way for two days’ cricket.

06:00am

Wicket!

Root LBW b Richardson 15 England are wheezing towards the finish line. With 17 needed to win, Joe Root pushes around a straight delivery from Jhye Richardson and is given out LBW. He reviews but it’s umpire’s call, hitting leg stump, and Root stomps off with a face like thunder. He’s had a frustrating series: one catharic century and not much else. FOW: 158/5

05:57am

OVER 28: ENG 154/4 (Root 13 Brook 8)

Brook gets his first boundary with a majestic shot, blasting Neser over mid-off. England are so close to winning a Test match in Australia for the first time since 7 January 2011.

It’s not what they wanted when they arrived here two months ago, but after everything they’ve been through, individually and collectively, it will mean the world to them.

Harry Brook launches Michael Neser for four. – Robert Cianflone/Getty Images

05:53am

OVER 27: ENG 146/4 (Root 12 Brook 1)

Brook tries to get off the mark by ramping Boland for four. He misses. almost wipes out Alex Carey and the ball bounces past everyone for four more byes.

A single into the leg side gets Brook up and running.

05:45am

OVER 26: ENG 141/4 (Root 12 Brook 0)

In a Test match full of eye-widening moments, this tops the lot: Alex Carey has failed to take a delivery down the leg side. Root missed a flick across the line at Neser and Carey could only punch the ball for four byes.

Those are the only runs from Neser’s over. England need 34 to win.

05:41am

OVER 25: ENG 137/4 (Root 12 Brook 0)

Brook, on the walk, is beaten by his first delivery. Boland is still making the ball zip both ways off the seam; another quick wicket could give England the heebie jeebies.

05:37am

Another costly Test match for Cricket Australia

The two-day finish in Perth cost Cricket Australia in the region of £2.5million. Given the huge crowds at the MCG, a two-day Test in Melbourne could be more expensive. And, ironically, Australian players themselves could be hurt financially; players collectively receive 27.5% of the board’s revenue under the revenue-sharing agreement.

05:37am

Wicket!

Bethell c Khawaja b Boland 40 It’s not over yet. Bethell makes room outside leg stump and blasts Boland towards extra cover, where Khawaja takes a very good low catch. Bethell goes for a crucial 40, the highest score of the innings, and here comes the shy, retiring Harry Brook. FOW: 137/4

05:35am

OVER 24: ENG 136/3 (Bethell 40 Root 11)

Bethell and Root are treating this like the middle overs of an ODI, keeping the scoreboard ticking over with low-risk ones and twos.

Michael Neser replaces Mitchell Starc and beats both Root (with a good delivery) and Bethell (with a ripper).

05:27am

OVER 23: ENG 133/3 (Bethell 39 Root 9)

Root almost overbalances after missing a leg side delivery from Boland. Carey once again had the bails off in a flash; his wicketkeeping in this series has been quite extraordinary.

When Root plays tip and run on the off side, a misfield from Weatherald turns one run into two.

05:26am

OVER 22: ENG 127/3 (Bethell 38 Root 4)

Bethell has steered a number of singles to third man, including three more in that Starc over. Root steals a couple of runs himself to make it a good over for England. Forty-eight to win.

05:20am

OVER 21: ENG 122/3 (Bethell 35 Root 2)

Root gets off the mark – and off a pair – by driving Boland for a couple. That was his 22nd ball of the match: 15 in the first innings, seven today.

Joe Root punches another drive off Scott Boland. – Asanka Brendon Ratnayake/Reuters

05:16am

OVER 20: ENG 119/3 (Bethell 34 Root 0)

Bethell plays and misses at an outrageous delivery from Starc, effectively a 90mph legbreak. He responds by charging the next ball and clouting it over mid-off for four! It was in the air but cleared the leaping Travis Head.

A leading edge through point shaves two more off the target. Bethell is enjoying himself out there; he steals a single off the final ball of the over to keep strike.

05:09am

OVER 19: ENG 112/3 (Bethell 27 Root 0)

Joe Root, who has never won a Test in Australia, is the new batter.

05:08am

Wicket!

Crawley LBW b Boland 37 You didn’t think it was going to be easy, did you? Zak Crawley has fallen LBW for 37 after missing a flick across the line at a classic Boland nipbacker. He reviewed on the off chance, but it was plumb. The end of another fine innings from Crawley; England still need 63 runs to win. FOW: 112/3

05:05am

OVER 18: ENG 111/2 (Crawley 37 Bethell 26)

Starc replaces Neser, whose five overs have disappeared for 43. Bethell glides a single to third man, Crawley forces another to deep point. Bethell is beaten by the latest jaffa to burst from this MCG pitch before steering another single to third man.

There is still the potential for a misery-inducing twist because it won’t be easy for new batters to start on pitch. And it’s worth remembering the Melbourne Test of 1998-99: Australia needed 175, the same as England, and seemed to be cruising when they reached 130 for 3. Seemed to be: England, inspired by Dean Headley, took the last seven wickets for 32 to win a classic match.

04:58am

OVER 17: ENG 108/2 (Crawley 36 Bethell 24)

Crawley is England’s leading runscorer in the series, which is some comeback after he bagged a pair at Perth. He continues to inch England closer to their target: 108 down, 67 to go.

It looks like Mitchell Starc is getting loose. Given the speed at which England are scoring, this feels like the last throw of the dice for Australia.

Zak Crawley in action at the MCG. – MARTIN KEEP/AFP

04:54am

OVER 16: ENG 104/2 (Crawley 34 Bethell 23)

Bethell is beaten by a good ball from Neser, and Carey has the bails off in a flash. Bethell’s back foot stayed at home and there’s no need for a stumping referral.

After Crawley pushes a single into the off side to bring up the England hundred, Bethell hooks superbly round the corner for four more. England need 71 more runs to compelete a famous and most peculiar victory.

04:52am

The unlikely sound of Bon Jovi… on day two

With England reaching 88 in pursuit of 175, the Barmy Army chant, heard increasingly during fourth-innings run chases, went up of “We’re halfway there” to Bon Jovi’s *Livin’ on a Prayer*. Nobody expected to hear it before 4pm on day two.

04:48am

OVER 15: ENG 97/2 (Crawley 32 Bethell 18)

Bethell threads another nice drive through extra cover off Boland, this time for a couple of runs. Then he charges Boland, who sees him coming and rams in a short ball; Bethell has no option but to wear it on the shoulder.

Jacob Bethell is hit on the shoulder by Scott Boland. – Hamish Blair/AP

04:44am

OVER 14: ENG 95/2 (Crawley 32 Bethell 16)

Alex Carey is up to the stumps for Michael Neser, a tactic that has worked so well all series. Crawley steers Neser’s first ball carefully behind square on the off side for three more, the cue for the Barmy Army to launch into a rendition of Livin’ on a Prayer.

Crawley gets very lucky later in the over when an edge flies wide of second slip at catchable height. Four more to England, who are scoring at almost seven runs an over.

04:39am

OVER 13: ENG 85/2 (Crawley 23 Bethell 15)

Scott Boland bowls the first ball after tea to Jacob Bethell… who reverse scoops over the keeper’s head for two. Of course he does.

Just as hundreds of purists are about to denounce English cricket forever, Bethell unfurls a gorgeous drive through extra cover for four.

Jacob Bethell plays an attacking stroke off Scott Boland. – Quinn Rooney/Getty Images

04:33am

The evening session

It’s time for the sixth and the final session of this absurd Test match. England need 98 runs, Australia need eight wickets.

04:25am

Farcical Test nears its end

Zak Crawley played for tea there like an old pro: enormous heave ho to Jhye Richardson that bisected pad and the inside edge and flew through to the keeper. It is that kind of day.

This will become the first series since 1912 to feature two two-day Tests as a farcical Boxing Day showpiece nears its end with England requiring 98 after the break with eight wickets in hand.

A win is a win for England in Australia and if they manage to make it over the line it will end 15 years – 5,468 days to be exact – since their last Test victory on an away Ashes. Brydon Carse’s four for 34, justified the faith of Ben Stokes, and brought Australia to their knees. His dismissal of Travis Head, bowled off stump by a ball that pitched on leg, sparked the collapse.

Australia lost seven for 50 leaving England 175 to win. It will be the highest total of the match if they get there and it is going to be a nipper. Ben Duckett swung for his life, hacked 34 off 26 to put on 51 for the first wicket with Crawley. Carse walked out to bat at No 3 in front of 86,000 in a moment of dark comedy. He fell for six, caught off a top edge at third man, and the spell from Scott Boland after tea could decide the Test.

04:16am

TEA: ENG 77/2 (Crawley 22 Bethall 9)

Another every-ball-is-an-event session and England now need 98 runs to win. This match has been farcical but also made for enthralling viewing. What we do know is that this match will be decided in the third and final session of day two.

04:10am

OVER 11: ENG 76/2 (Crawley 22 Bethall 9)

There’s a huge cheer as Boland comes on to bowl, not sure why he hasn’t come on sooner. Second ball he wraps Crawley on the pads, there’s an appeal but it’s given not out. The Australians review but it hit the opener outside the line and Crawley survives. Amid the chaos there are moments that wouldn’t look out of place in the MMC textbook, Bethell plays a delightful on-drive for four. England now need 99 for the win.

04:04am

OVER 10: ENG 70/2 (Crawley 22 Bethall 4)

That was an interesting experiment/cameo…England still need 110 for the win. In comes Bethell, not Tongue, or the ghost of Douglas Jardine or any other unexpected visitors to the middle. Bethell is off the mark with a thick outside edge for four as he attempted to pull through mid-wicket.

04:01am

WICKET!

Carse c Green b Richardson 6

Carse tries to tee off and is lucky not to find one of the two men lurking with intent near cow corner. He tries his luck again and this time he top edges to third man.

FOW – 65/2

03:57am

OVER 9: ENG 61/1 (Crawley 21 Carse 3)

Crawley drives Starc imperiously for four and, dare I say it, England are looking good for the win. It’s the Australians very much on the back foot at the moment…

03:53am

OVER 8: ENG 56/1 (Crawley 17 Carse 2)

Well, well, well look who comes out at No 3…it’s Brydon Carse. The message is clear, get the runs as soon as possible a la a pinch hitter. Richardson is into the attack and it’s no shock at all to see Carse charge him before he dabs to third man for a single. Nick Hoult’s report from yesterday mentioned the word circus and it’s not hard to see why. This is cricket that almost makes T20 look conventional. Five from the over.

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We are officially through the looking glass, with Brydon Carse in at No3 and doing a Happy Gilmore impression first ball. What on earth.

03:47am

WICKET!

Duckett b Starc 34

Starc has been looking for the yorker and finally finds it, Duckett, however, has got England off to the perfect start.

FOW – 51/1

03:46am

OVER 6.5: ENG 51/0 (Crawley 15 Duckett 34)

Starc is still getting good shape on the ball and not for the first time Duckett wafts at a ball wide of off peg and gets nowhere near it. The opener then does middle the ball for two through the covers and in doing so passes 3,000 Test runs. It’s fair to say things haven’t gone his way this series and this week, but he cuts for four the very next ball and this pair has its forst 50 partnership of the series and what a time for it to finally arrive…

03:41am

OVER 6: ENG 45/0 (Crawley 15 Duckett 28)

Duckett tries to heave-ho the ball into the Yarra River but only succeeds in top edging it. But it’s over the slip cordon for four. He follows that up with a ramp shot off a full Neser ball for SIX – extraordinary. Then possibly the most shocking thing of the entire Test: Duckett plays a textbook forward defensive that is greeted by one of the loudest cheers of the day. The field is now spread and there are now singles to be had – this is the the Bazball of old.

03:36am

OVER 5: ENG 34/0 (Crawley 15 Duckett 17)

England have made it clear how they’re going to tackle this run-chase. The defensive game has not only gone out the window, it’s jumped into the river, down the estuary and is now miles away bobbing up and down in the middle of the ocean…Crawley tries to smash Starc down the ground, missing a good inswinger that also misses the stumps, just…Starc then thinks he has his man with another inswinger that wraps Crawley on the pads, it’s given not out and the hosts review. The tech shows that it would have been hitting BUT it’s umpire’s call. Two Duckett twos follow before a punch to the vacant mid-wicket region earns the left-hander a three. This is sloppy from the Australians who are now under pressure.

03:30am

OVER 4: ENG 26/0 (Crawley 15 Duckett 10)

Pressure? What pressure?! Crawley stands there and dismissively hits Neser over his head for six – shot of the match so far. He follows that up with a four through the covers and this is just the start England would have wanted. WinViz (anyone know how it works?!) has the tourists on 78 per cent to win. Has WinViz seen the pitch?! A single gets Duckett on strike and he tries to hit it over the keeper, he misses as does Carey with the gloves. This really is a madcap match.

03:25am

OVER 3: ENG 13/0 (Crawley 4 Duckett 10)

Duckett tries to tee off again, a wild swipe at a ball on about ninth stump. Starc then bowls too straight and that’s meat and drink for the left-hander who flicks it for four to the square-leg boundary. The bowler responds with two peaches that beat Duckett’s outside edge. I think a wicket may come sooner rather than later based on these first few balls. Every ball is an event and as I type that Starc drops a tough caught and bowled chance, the Australian just couldn’t get his fingers under the ball while at full stretch.

03:20am

OVER 2: ENG 9/0 (Crawley 4 Duckett 4)

Crawley hits over the infield for two, he, too, isn’t going to stick in his crease and see what’s happening, it’s obvious what it happening – he is going to try and take the attack to the hosts. He tries to whack Neser again off his length pulling for another two. Four from that over.

03:17am

This stat says a lot about the two respective MCG pitches in question…

03:16am

OVER 1: ENG 5/0 (Crawley 0 Duckett 4)

Starc with the new ball, how much is he licking his lips having seen yet more carnage today? I reckon the answer is ‘a lot’ but not when Duckett hits him for four to the square-leg boundary. The opener then wafts at a wide one, missing it. It’s clear he’s going to commit to every shot and not be tentative, as he has been the past two Tests. Starc then beats the left-hander’s outside edge, that was close. Five from yet another eventful over…(Written that a lot these past two days…)

03:12am

Anyone brave enough to make a prediction?!

Rob Smyth, who will take over this blog for the final session, has just messaged to say “It wouldn’t surprise me if England were all out for 30 or won at a canter!”

It made me laugh and I also reckon he’s bang on – who knows what will happen…we’re about to find out…

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Before England get their chase underway, a stat to confound you: Brydon Carse has 19 wickets at an average of 25.6 in this series, with a game to spare. James Anderson, in five Ashes tours, took more than 17 wickets just once. And of all England bowlers since 2010/11, the best tour is Stuart Broad’s 21 wickets in 2013/14.

03:10am

Time for England’s examination

The players are out on the pitch, will the heavy roller have any impact on the pitch? Going on the first three innings, I reckon the answer will be a big, fat ‘NO’…

03:07am

Fans and event deserve better

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What on earth to make of that then? I can’t help but be left feeling a bit hollow by the whole experience, whatever the result. This is one of the great sporting occasions, anywhere in the world. The thick end of 200,000 people have poured in across two days, and the actual sport barely resembles what they signed up for. There are a lot of factors at play – pitch, technique, temperament – but I feel like this event deserves a little better.

Wickets have not been hard to come by on a minefield of a pitch – Getty Images/Morgan Hancock

03:05am

Brook and Atkinson to be the heroes? England can dream…

Harry Brook is the man to win this game for England. But it is a lot of runs and the lack of confidence could be insurmountable for England. This is an ugly spectacle for Test cricket but it could end in an absolute thriller with an injured Atkinson trying to get England over the line.

03:01am

AUSTRALIA ALL OUT FOR 132

Richardson has a first-class average of 22 so he can hold a bat, as he’s showing here. But he fancies himself bit too much with the bat and he gifts Crawley an easy catch trying to hit Stokes into the stand.

England set 175 to win.

02:57am

OVER 34: AUS 131/9 (Smith 23 Richardson 7)

Smith again takes a single off the first ball – not sure what he’s doing there. Well, he obviously knew Richardson was gong to confidently pull through mid-wicket for three. Smith, now back on strike, does indeed try to find some scoring shots. He missed with an attempted glide through the offside before taking another single that he hoped would garner two. Richardson then plays a delightful drive down the ground for four. The No.11 looking like a top-order maestro. Nine from the over and the Australia lead is now 173.

02:52am

OVER 33: AUS 122/9 (Smith 21 Richardson 0)

Smith thinks he has a two off the first ball of this Stokes over but it’s just a singe and he’s exposed Richardson to five ball. Error and one the captain is all too aware of going on his facial expression. Three dot balls are followed by a backfoot defensive leaving the new man just one ball to survive. Can he do it? Yes, he can! How will Smith play this now, he has to go on the attack, surely??

02:49am

OVER 32: AUS 121/9 (Smith 20 Richardson 0)

Don’t think I am Nostradamus by saying it’s not long until England’s second innings gets under way…

02:48am

WICKET!

Starc c Root b Carse 0

Starc is the new man as the lead stands 162. How long before Duckett and Crawley need to pad up? In the final ball of the over a no-ball is called, it doesn’t look like a no-ball and low and beyond Starc edges to Root with the seventh ball of the over…

FOW – 121/9

02:44am

WICKET!

Neser c&b Carse 0

Neser is squared up and offers up a return catch to Carse who takes it well.

FOW – 120/8

02:41am

OVER 31: AUS 119/7 (Smith 19 Neser 0)

It’s a wicket-maiden and that over illustrates two things (i) Stokes is the man England more often than not rely on to summon up much-needed wickets and (ii) the uneven bounce means on this pitch, more than yesterday, a wicket is never far away.

Australia’s lead is 161.

02:39am

WICKET!

Green c Brook b Stokes 19

Stokes brings himself on, England could do with his golden arm anytime now. Green, who is under pressure, has looked good so far BUT no sooner do I write that than he wafts at one he doesn’t need to and Brook takes it well at second slip.

FOW – 119/7

02:34am

OVER 30: AUS 119/6 (Smith 19 Green 19)

After the chaos the the half-hour before lunch a sense of calm has returned out in the middle for the hosts. This pair are going about their task without fuss, 30 more minutes of this and England could be out of the match. They are running between the wickets well and this partnership is now worth 31, in a low-scoring Test that is worth its weight in gold.

02:31am

Are the slips too far back?

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As another catch slips just short of the fingertips, the question arises again: have England’s slippers simply been standing too far back all series? Australia’s edges seem to carry to their – frankly much superior – slippers at knee height, whereas England’s are always grasping at grass. That starts with the keeper, who sets the tone. Smith probably needs to take a step or two forward. This pitch is a wild mess, but it’s not rapid.

02:30am

OVER 29: AUS 116/6 (Smith 18 Green 17)

Carse finds the edge of Smith’s bat but the ball falls short of Brook at second slip. The England slip cordon looks quite far up, but perhaps not enough. Two singles follow and the lead is up to 158. How much is too much? Over 200 would be more than tricky…

02:25am

OVER 28: AUS 114/6 (Smith 17 Green 16)

England could do with a few parsimonious overs as well as wickets here. Tongue continues after his previous expensive over but atones with a much-needed maiden.

02:22am

OVER 27: AUS 114/6 (Smith 17 Green 16)

Carse opens this over with a full toss that surprises Smith. There then follows four byes down the leg side that nutmegs Smith. Four more runs that adds to the size of the task the tourists will face. Carse then locates his radar and appeals for lbw – it’s given not out but England are adamant it’s out and review. It’s hit Smith on the back leg, but it’s missing leg by a fair bit.

02:17am

OVER 26: AUS 110/6 (Smith 17 Green 16)

Back under way in the Test (and series) that seemingly does not not only have a pause button, but also is permanently on fast forward. Smith is the key here, if he can stay in and guide Australian to a lead of over 200 (still over 50 runs away) then you suspect England will struggle. Tongue again finds the edge but it’s a thick one and Green earns another four, in much the same way as he did just before lunch. The England bowler then bowls too straight and a leg glance gets Green another boundary. An overthrow follows and with a no-ball preceding it these are runs England could do without having to chase. Twelve runs from the over.

01:55am

Two-day Tests no longer a rarity?

Two-day Test matches are supposed to be vanishingly rare. Cricket went 54 years, from 1946 to 2000, without seeing one anywhere. And now we could be about to see two in the same series.

01:43am

England have a chance but it’s a hollow game of cricket

Day three ticket holders are the most nervous people in Melbourne right now. Australia are 98 for six, leading by 140 at lunch on day two as the Boxing Day Test continues to be played like a Big Bash match in whites.

There was extravagant seam movement again when England hit the right areas and the conditions are so favourable for bowling that they are probably going to be able to cope with the loss of Gus Atkinson with a hamstring injury.

Josh Tongue was a real handful, hitting the right length and moving the ball both ways for two for 29 off eight overs. He dismissed Marnus Labuschagne for the third time in the series, caught low down at slip. The Australian’s dissent at the decision to uphold the catch spoke volumes for his form and state of mind.

Brydon Carse bowled his best ball of the series, scrambled seam that pitched on leg and hit off to bowl Head for 46 during a dangerous period just before lunch. He then added Alex Carey to his collection moments later. It was a South Australia one-two that could have a big say on the outcome of the match.

The Perth Test was the first two-day Test in Ashes cricket in Australia. To have a second in the series would be robbing the fans. Modern players and seaming pitches do not blend well. Not enough practice the defensive shots or leaves and have no real idea how to survive.

It could be a really thrilling finale and any win is a good win for England after such a long drought in Australia if they pull it off but many will be left feeling short changed by a hollow game of Test cricket.

01:36am

An ugly realisation

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It’s hard to know what’s worse from an England point of view.

That they have been beaten so comprehensively by an Australia team that has seen Cummins play one match, Hazlewood none, and Lyon effectively one.

Or that Australia’s batting lineup has been utterly dysfunctional, with three or four players horribly out of form, from pretty much the start of the series.

It’s been very, very ugly.

01:33am

Lunch: Australia 98/6, a lead of 140 runs

Twenty-six wickets have fallen in four sessions. Yep, the pitch is still offering up Christmas joy to the bowlers and this very much could be over in two days. The good news is that England are back in this.

01:31am

OVER 25: AUS 98/6 (Smith 16 Green 6)

Green is under pressure for his place, he’s off the mark with a two through mid-wicket. A ball later he’s hit with a nip-backer that also gets big on him. The last ball of yet another eventful session sees Green send a thick outside edge to the boundary.

01:26am

OVER 24: AUS 92/6 (Smith 16 Green 0)

England have their tails up and appeal when Tongue wraps Smith on the pads – will they appeal, no they won’t and it’s the right decision, it was probably too high and wide. Smith then plays a textbook on-drive for four, Australia needed that just, if only for a ball or two, to take the pressure off. Tongue then beats the outside edge with one that gets extravagant movement.

01:22am

OVER 23: AUS 88/6 (Smith 12 Green 0)

What would England give for another wicket or two before lunch? They very nearly have one as Carse, over the wicket, gets one to nip away and bounce at Carey who would have been in the form of his life had he nicked that. Then Carse bowls a similar line and has his man.

Australia were 82 for three and now are in deep trouble. England are very much back in this.

01:20am

WICKET!

Carey c Brook b Carse 4

Carse has found the perfect length and another wobble-seam delivery finds the edge of Carey’s bat and Brook snatches the ball with glee. Australia are in trouble.

FOW – 88/6

01:16am

OVER 22: AUS 87/5 (Smith 11 Carey 4)

Australia were coasting but that top edge from Khawaja has changed the complexion of this match. England, dare I say it, are back in this. Carey is he new batsman and he’s off the mark with a four down the ground.

01:14am

WICKET!

Khawaja c sub (Pope) b Tongue 0

Poor shot from the new batsman who picks out Pope, the sub fielder, at deep square-leg with a pull that wasn’t really called for in the circumstances.

FOW – 83/5

01:12am

OVER 21: AUS 82/4 (Smith 11 Khawaja 0)

That wicket is just what England needed – I was about to write ‘England aren’t asking enough questions of the Australian batsmen’ then Carse bowled that peach, wonderful bit of bowling.

01:10am

WICKET!

Head b Carse 46

What an important wicket that could prove to be and what ball. Carse beats the forward prod of Australia’s dangerman with one that beats the outside edge and clips the top of off.

FOW – 82/4

01:04am

OVER 20: AUS 79/3 (Head 46 Smith 8)

Tongue has been, once again, the pick of the England bowlers but Head is seeing the ball well, once again, and it’s looking ominous. As I type that he hits on the up for three through the covers. England have given the opener too much width today. They got him out yesterday by bowling straight at him.

01:01am

Big crowds, not enough action

I would expect today’s crowd, after MCG’s day one attendance of 94,199 (a record for cricket here), also to be nudging the 90,000 mark. The queues to enter the Olympic Stand before play were enormous. In the circumstances, it feels like an act of self-sabotage by the sport to curtail the majesty of the Boxing Day Ashes Test so severely. It could all be over after two-and-a-half days, possibly less. Spectacles on this scale come along all too rarely in cricket, and Matt Page, the MCG groundsman (full title: Executive Manager of Turf), deserves all the scrutiny he is receiving.

01:00am

OVER 19: AUS 73/3 (Head 43 Smith 5)

First ball of this Stokes over is pure weapons-grade Travis Head – he kneels into ta full ball hitting it on the up over wide long-on. Having been given a life the worry will be that he’ll make them pay as he did in Perth.

12:56am

OVER 18: AUS 68/3 (Head 38 Smith 5)

Tongue now has his ‘bunny’ (has taken his wicket in every match they’ve faced each other) and Smith greets his nemesis with a drive through the covers for three. England needed that wicket of Labuschagne, the Test was drifting (drifting being the operative word) away from the tourists. Smith then leaves one on length, there’s a muted appeal which is greeted by the Australian captain miming to the Tongue that it’s clearly too high. Interesting.

12:51am

WICKET!

Labuschagne c Root b Tongue 8

Tongue again finds that testing length forcing the Australian to prod forward with all the confidence of nervous schoolboy. It looks as though it carries to Root and it’s given out. Labuschagne claims it hits the ground BUT the third umpire is having none of it and off the Australian walks.

FOW – 61/3

12:48am

OVER 17: AUS 61/2 (Head 37 Labuschagne 8)

England are a bowler down and in need of a wicket with the Australia lead now uo to three figures. Stokes is so often the man to summon those need-it-now moments but even he errs on line and Head flicks off his pad for an easy two to bring the over to a close.

12:42am

OVER 16: AUS 57/2 (Head 34 Labuschagne 7)

Tongue continues to give the ball a chance by bowling full and on or around fourth stump. A much-needed maiden.

12:40am

OVER 15: AUS 57/2 (Head 34 Labuschagne 7)

Stokes to Head and the batsman guides a wide (ish) ball for two down two the vacant third man boundary. A four follows in much the same fashion and the lead is up to 99 in a match where anything over 200-220 is likely to be more than tricky.

12:35am

Unfortunately for England, catches win matches…

A potentially damaging drop by Will Jacks at point, as Travis Head leans into the square drive. He seemed only to see the ball in the final split-second, as if dazzled by the light. It would have been an excellent catch, but Australia have taken just about every one with this degree of difficulty throughout the series.

12:34am

Sympathy for Jacks, worry over Atkinson

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England say Atkinson is being assessed for a left hamstring injury.

Meanwhile, there’s a lot of sympathy for Will Jacks for that dropped catch on the local broadcast. Chris Rogers, the Victoria coach, says he would battle with team-mates not to field square of the wicket when the MCG was full because it was so difficult to pick the ball out of the crowd.

Will Atkinson be able to bowl later? – Getty Images/Daniel Pockett

12:31am

OVER 14: AUS 51/2 (Head 28 Labuschagne 7)

Tongue is now getting the ball to rear up off a length – did someone say this wasn’t the best pitch to bat on… Head deals with it well, though, and survives the scare. Then Head flashes hard at a wide one, it’s straight at Jacks who possibly doesn’t see it, the very good chance is not taken (he sticks one hand out late) and that is a horrendous miss and one that could prove costly. Ouch.

12:28am

OVER 13: AUS 48/2 (Head 26 Labuschagne 7)

Stokes gets one to rear up off a decent length and it wraps the knuckles of Labuschagne who is clearly hurt. A shake of the hand and all is well with the world. That is until, two balls later, the very same thing happens again and this time the Australian looks more hurt. That ball hit the same spot as the initial one and nipped back as well. Those are the sort of balls that cause a fair amount (as in A LOT) of doubt to enter a batsman’s head. Two balls later the England captain finds the outside edge but it’s played down for four to the vacant third man boundary. That was the dictionary definition of an ‘eventful over’.

12:23am

OVER 12: AUS 42/2 (Head 26 Labuschagne 1)

Good over from Tongue who is bowling fuller than Atkinson and Carse did. Two from it.

Waetherald can only watch as he's bowled by Stokes — Waetherald can only watch as he’s bowled by Stokes – Getty Images/Graham Denholm

12:21am

Injury woe could begat more injury woe

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This Atkinson injury the sort that could set up a really nasty day for England. Atkinson has been England’s most consistent bowler in this game, putting the ball in the right area. If he can’t bowl, that means more Stokes, who is always an injury risk, and more Carse, who is all over the oche.

As I type that, Stokes has jagged one a mile back to bowl Weatherald, who is now on a sneaky poor run.

12:19am

OVER 11: AUS 40/2 (Head 25 Labuschagne 0)

Stokes brings himself on. Swann, on TNT commentary, says he looked as though he wasn’t that loose in the warm-up and might have been carrying an injury – hope he’s wrong. A Head single gets Weatherald on strike and immediately the captain wraps him on the pads, the Australian is well forward, though, and the appeal is half-hearted at best…But Stokes has his man then next ball and in comes Labuschagne.

12:16am

WICKET!

Weatherald b Stokes 5

Lovely ball from Stokes, he pitches it up and the Australian is in two minds about whether to play or not. In the end he leaves it and it’s fair to say it’s a bad leave.

FOW – 40/2

12:11am

OVER 10: AUS 39/1 (Head 24 Weatherald 5)

Tongue is into the attack and on a hat-trick but there’s no joy as a full and straight ball is pushed to leg side for three. It all seems a bit hum drum out there at the moment, England need to inject a bit of intensity out there.

12:09am

Trouble for Atkinson?

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That is very bad news for England, with Gus Atkinson looking like he’s pinged something there. He’s taken himself off the ground, but looked like he knew immediately.

12:06am

OVER 9: AUS 35/1 (Head 23 Weatherald 2)

In a low-scoring game there cannot be too many freebies offered up but the England attack but they’ve offered a few already today. This time Atkinson bowls short to Weatherald and he can get off strike with an easy pull for one. The England man is going around the wicket to Head when they got him out bowling over the wicket yesterday, denying him room…not sure why the tourists are not doing the same this morning.

When you think about England’s bowling yesterday, it was a mixed bag. There were two leg side strangles, a run out and Starc spooned one to mid off. Tongue bowled well and Atkinson too but Australia were not rolled over like they were in Perth on day one. This is feeling ominous already today.

12:02am

OVER 8: AUS 32/1 (Head 21 Weatherald 1)

So close to deja vu as Head nearly chops onto his stumps, the ball, fortunately for him, evading the stumps. A push through the covers for three follows. Head is then offered width and he does not look this gift horse in the mouth cutting for four. Yesterday England didn’t allow him to cut the ball once, but so far today I make it three from the opener. Not good.

11:58pm

OVER 7: AUS 22/1 (Head 12 Weatherald 0)

Now the nightwatchman has gone the real work starts for England. Weatherald is a very busy player at the crease, waving his bat up and down as the bowler runs into bowl. Atkinson comes round the wicket and ends the over with a peach, getting the ball to move away and flirt with the left-hander’s outside edge. A wicket maiden to follow the maiden from Carse – just what England need.

11:53pm

WICKET!

Boland c Smith b Atkinson 6

Atkinson finally finds the right line and length and lets the pitch do the rest, nipping away catching the outside edge and it’s a good catch from Smith with the gloves.

FOW – 22/1

11:51pm

OVER 6: AUS 22/0 (Boland 6 Head 12)

England need to build pressure and dry the flow of runs. That’s what Carse does here bowling a lovely tight line to Head and it’s a maiden. That’s more like it.

11:50pm

Situation could suit Head

This innings could be Head’s bid to be player of the series. The conditions and the game situation suit him, allowing Head to play his attacking game and take chances. England need to be on the money in the first hour and the worry is they seem incapable of switching on quickly.

Travis Head — Head has reached 400 runs for the series – Shutterstock /Joel Carrett

11:48pm

OVER 5: AUS 22/0 (Boland 6 Head 12)

What does Head love? A bit of width and that’s exactly what Atkinson serves up first up, the opener hitting for four to the cover boundary. That’s followed up with a half-volley that the Head leans into for an elegant two – that’s his 400th run of the series, impressive. Atkinson bowls too short with his fourth ball and Head pulls for three – this isn’t a great over. A Boland push for two down the ground only adds to the mini sense of frustration with that over, 11 off it…

11:43pm

OVER 4: AUS 11/0 (Boland 4 Head 3)

There is a bit of movement with the first two balls of this Carse over, but they’re too short and Boland doesn’t need to play at them. The England bowler then finds the right length and beats the Australian’s bat with a peach. The ball is definitely nipping about now – lesson: pitch it up and let the wicket to the work.

11:39pm

OVER 3: AUS 11/0 (Boland 4 Head 3)

Atkinson start off with two fullish deliveries that are both met with the full face of Head’s bat. There’s a leg slip in place but the England man, going around the wicket, bowls too straight and Head pushes down the ground for two. It’s been a quiet start to the day with the ball behaving itself, bar the second delivery of the first over.

11:35pm

OVER 2: AUS 9/0 (Boland 4 Head 1)

It’s Carse to open the bowling rather than Tongue who is on a hat-trick and was the pick of the attack yesterday, interesting…The second ball lifts up from a length and Head does well to fend it off at chest height. The first run of the day comes with a flick off Head’s hip for a single. Here’s Boland, the wicket England will be expecting sooner rather than later, four leg-byes are greeted with a huge cheer, they love him at ‘The G’.

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It seems fairly remarkable to me that Stokes has started off with Carse this morning. He’s a willing trier who has had some excellent moments in an England shirt, but has been wayward since Perth. Really, he was the difference between the two teams yesterday, and not in a good way. This is a pitch that rewards simply putting the ball in the right area for six balls in a row, which Carse is struggling with.

11:29pm

The England players are out on the pitch

And the one-time-only opening partnership of Boland and Head have joined them.

Big session coming up.

Captain Ben Stokes lead his England players out – Getty Images/ Quinn Rooney

11:26pm

Batting to remain tough

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Good morning from the MCG. It’s warmer today, and the feeling is that batting will remain very difficult today. The groundsman Matt Page was even talking broadcasters last night that it would get harder!

Nick is utterly certain that the game won’t finish today, but I’m not so sure.

Scott Boland (left) and Travis Head, the Australia openers, walk out before resuming their second innings at MCG – Getty Images/Graham Denholm

11:15pm

Weather watch

It was overcast and chilly for a lot of yesterday. Well, I don’t think there’s a need for coats and jumpers today as the sun is set to shine with the temperature topping 20C. What will that do to the pitch? It needs flattening out but will this be enough?

On the TNT coverage Graeme Swann and Alastair Cook are giving their pitch report now, and the pair say it still looks as though the bowlers will continue to get a fair bit of help. The pitch has now had three heavy rollers, will that flatten the pitch? We’re about to find out…

10:58pm

England will need Tongue to find his range quickly today

I am no cricket coach, but reckon McCullum will be telling the England fast bowler ‘more of the same, please’.

10:52pm

Pitch problems

We all became agronomy experts on day one, when all the talk was of the MCG pitch. Apparently, there was 10mm of grass on the wicket which was a late Christmas present for the two attacks. Why? Well, the answer may well lie in Alastair Cook’s double ton from eight years ago. You should never poo poo a double century, but if you were to then it might well be the former England captain’s snoozefest at the MCG. The pitch was flat, and across the five days only 25 wickets fell. Has this match, when 20 fell on the first day, gone too far the other way?

MCG’s farcical pitch is all Sir Alastair Cook’s fault

10:38pm

How the first day went

Here’s the report on a madcap first day at the MCG, when 20 wickets fell and, for once, the ‘blame’ lay with the pitch rather than batsmen’s troubled techniques.

England reeling after 20 wickets fall on opening day of Melbourne Test

Wickets tumbled on Boxing Day – PA/Robbie Stephenson

09:57pm

England once again on the back foot

England brought some Christmas cheer to their suffering fans by dominating the first two sessions of the Boxing Day Test. Alas, the merriment of having bowled Australia out for 152 was soon followed by a hangover of festive proportions. The tourists were bowled out for 110 after tea to be on the back foot for the umpteenth time this series.

However, for once, it was not the failings of English batsmen (their technique and temperament) in the spotlight. On a day when 20 wickets fell the pitch was the focus of pointed questions.

There was 10mm on grass on the MCG day one – by comparison there were 7mm on the Perth pitch when 19 wickets fell on the first day. To make matters worse, the groundsman expects the pitch to nip around just as much on day two but with the added ingredient of it playing also quicker. Gulp…

Now here are the reasons for England to be positive. Should the pitch prediction be correct the tourists’ attack will fancy its chances of making early inroads today. Not least because on the first day Josh Tongue (who took five for 45) and Co looked as probing and dangerous as any England bowling performance this series (not overly hard, I know…). Added to that the hosts sent out Scott Boland l to open with Travis Head – a walking wicket able to offer up some much-needed early joy on day two? More than some would say yes…

Speaking on the BBC, Telegraph columnist Michael Vaughan said this is England’s “best chance” of winning a Test during what has been a tough series.

“They are a good chasing side. We have had three heavy rollers already and there will be another one tomorrow morning,” the former England captain said.

“This England team can chase. Australia are favourites, but don’t rule England out.”

The first session will tell us a lot regarding whether Vaughan is right or not.

Stay here for all the action, with anything possible on a pitch, and in a series, where the outrageous has never been far from making an appearance.

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